This is a fictional story and any resemblance to reality is just a coincidence.
I woke up in a different space
The light was hard
And in the first seconds
I couldn’t see anything
I blocked my eyes with one hand
So my eyes got used to that place.
There was sand under my feet
And a loud sound of waves and wind
It was a little piece of ground
In the middle of an ocean
Trees were living on the island also
And other greens.
I was alone
And I couldn’t remember how I had gone to that place
I didn’t see a transport, just the nature
its rhythms and forms.
I walked to the edge of the beach
To feel the sea kissing my toes
When it started, I closed my eyes
and memories began to appear.
I saw myself closed in a box
Around me, out of the box, noises
Familiar voices and laughs
“The people have been known!”, I thought
So like a miracle, I saw a hole in the box
And when I put my eyes
I saw something that I couldn’t deny.
People who said to me, “I love you!” had a plan
Included me out of their ways
Because I was not like they desired
So they gifted me with a wine blessed by sleeping pills
And I was ingenuous, I drank
I thought, “everything is fine!”.
I opened my eyes
I felt a pressure in my heart
Tears weren’t in my face
But my expression was different
And I got off to the beach.
I didn’t know exactly what to feel
I didn’t know exactly what to think
My heartbeats were fast
My heart was officially cracked
“How was I so innocent?”, I thought
and my thoughts haven’t stopped
“Sometimes you’ll see something.”
“Sometimes you’ll turn a blind eye.”
“Because feelings and relations were important…”.
“Fuck all this shit!”, I screamed
And when I was close to a tree
I sat down and leaned my back on the trunk
I couldn’t stand up
I closed my eyes, and memories again.
I was in a celebration
A big house with a big pool
People named “friends” or “family” were dancing
There was a DJ responsible for the music
The month was July
It was a party to something
I was avoided
Because my choice was distinct
Every person there lived in a portrait
It would be something good
If it had been an own choice
But it was something to make the society smile
It was a tragedy to be announced
And I was not part of this
My choices, my life, my happiness
My sadness, my anger
I chose to make me satisfied, instead of the others
My circle was outraged
But we kept our contact
So to me everything was fine
But I confess I didn’t read the hidden lines
I was stupid, yeah, I was stupid
They talked to me when the protocol said it
And then they avoid me always when they could do it
The parties, the parks, the movie theatres
The malls, the rivers, and in other spaces
And there were a lot of whispers
They were stranger than the normal
So they invited me to a dinner, “friends” and/or “family”.
Red was the colour of my hands
White was the colour of the moon
The ocean’s sound was the same every day
But there existed a new element that night
The boat, my boat, which was built using the woods.
I didn’t know the name of the island
So I called that place “Island of the truth”
I baptised that space with my sperm
Because a part of me always lived there
And this was my way to say “thank you!”.
My boat was setting sail
I closed my eyes and breathed deeply.
I was there, they were there
“Hey, xxxxxx, it's been a long time!”
“Yes, how are you doing?”
“We are fine… We decided to hike in the park today!”
“That’s great!”
“We didn’t know you liked to walk here, xxxxxx!”
“Yes, I like to do it… I record that I talked sometimes.”
“But… We didn’t remember… Anyway, it was a pleasure! Bye!”
I was there, they were there
A day in the summer
The park was crowded
The river was brightening with the light
I felt something strange
Something I couldn’t explain
But I just walked
“This is just in my head!”, I thought
And I walked.
I was at home
The boat was in the pier
There was someone loyal to me
He protected my patrimony during the time
He said he didn’t know what to do to find me
“Maybe it’s the truth, maybe it’s a lie!”, I thought
The point was: without his actions, I’d have nothing
So I needed to say to him, “Thank you!”.
We were preparing something
My return could not be unnoticed
So we were preparing a party
And the theme was “ISLAND OF THE TRUTH”
It would be and was a party on the beach
No one knew about me.
At 8 p.m. the party started
He received the people and talked about a great attraction
They were curious, drinking and eating
They tried to cut me and stole my things
They treated me like shit, and they wanted my things
He spoke into the microphone
And I knew what to do
I was dressed in red like the blood of my hands
The blood, which made the boat
I walked to the centre of the party
My head was covered with a fabric
I could hear the whispers, and I revealed my face
He was excited, I was excited, and they were scared
And I said,
“Hello, my sweeties, I’m still here!”.
Victor dos Anjos 